Quest Magazine

By Robert W. Bonnell

Originally printed in the Summer 2009 issue of Quest magazine. 
Citation: Bonnell, Robert W. "Illness As Spiritual Experience." Quest  97. 3 (Summer 2009): 108-109, 112.

All kingdoms of life ascend by virtue of the divine principle within them. This motivation, spiritual in essence, strives to elevate all life to higher planes of expression. As part of our being is universal, we share in the trials and tribulations of the working out of this cosmic plan. Such a relationship demands continual changes in our concepts. Change is necessary both for progress and for inner unification.

In the human kingdom, the spiritual or higher mind is the recipient of the divine pulsation, and it in turn transmits the impulse to the lower or outer spheres. As the creative impulse manifests in the physical mind and body, reactions of various magnitudes occur, arousing a variety of emotions depending upon the receptivity of the lower mind. The inability of the physical mind to grasp this impulse for what it truly is causes disharmony, resulting in physical and mental illness. (The terms physical mind or brain-mind do not imply that the mind is contained within the physical brain. After-death periods of torment, reflection, and bliss are conscious experiences that indicate the existence of some degree of analytical awareness apart from the brain. The function of the brain, which in itself is nothing but a mass of nerve tissue, is to instigate and maintain physiological nerve impulses.)

To understand human problems, including illness, we must employ a broad, intuitive view. As a book cannot be read through a pinhole, the Book of Life cannot be fully read through the pinhole view of the brain-mind or under the shadow of the personality. The larger openings of the philosophic or impersonal must be sought. Any investigation of life must include the abstract, spiritual view and will reveal that the physical plane is merely one of effects and reactions. Original cause or action is not conceived here. In the drama of life, the spiritual mind is the dramatist, the physical mind is the actor, and the body or physical plane is the stage whose settings must continually change to meet the moods of the play.

All evolutionary processes first contact the individuality through the spiritual mind, so that all physical reaction is due, in some respect, to a spiritual impulse. At our present degree of awareness, we harbor the emotions of both sides of the mental plane, sharing the bliss of spiritual nature and the passions of earthly desires at the same time. The lower, conscious mind is where disharmony arises. Sickness is perhaps the most common reaction. The body is not the cause of sickness; what is commonly known as disease is actually the body's effort to protect itself against this vibratory intrusion. Reactions such as pain, fever, congestion, inflammation, chills, tumors, mucus, coughing, and diarrhea, are not destructive but constructive. They can be compared with the coiling of a snake when it senses danger: the coiling is not the danger but a reaction to danger. Coiling is not the snake's normal position, but under certain conditions it is quite normal. Likewise, fever, chills, tumors, heart enlargements, and so forth, are not normal states, but under certain conditions they are not only normal but necessary to the life of the body.

Scientific research is looking intently for the cause of man's physical woes, but the search is for the most part confined to the physical realm, which can at best reveal nothing but effects. That new discoveries differ from the old does not necessarily indicate that anything truly causative has been found. Much research is like a merry-go-round, moving but going nowhere. The original cause of anything, including disease, cannot be found in the material sphere of life, which by itself cannot create; it simply does not have the mechanism for it. It is not the plane of the manifester but of the manifested. Illness and the cause of illness inhabit different planes, one being the reaction to the other. Future research must recognize man as a product of divinity, containing the properties of both spirit and matter, and must acknowledge that disharmony merely results from the working out of the conflict of spirit versus matter. Christian symbology hints at this truth in the martyrdom of the Crucifixion and subsequent triumph of the Resurrection: the inner Christ versus the outer flesh, the higher versus the lower.

Today, then, the greatest dilemma comes from mistaking effect for cause. There may be effects causing effects within the physical plane, but the initial cause can be never found within the physical realm. Therefore all physical process, including illness, is reaction to nonphysical stimuli. These ideas lead to two conclusions:

1. Physical illness rarely has a physical cause.
2. Any outside physical influence affecting the body cannot be a primary cause.

This second point may seem difficult to understand if the illness is, for instance, the result of an automobile accident, but the law applies here also. What, after all, is the true nature of an accident? Is it coincidence or bad luck? Such an interpretation can never provide true understanding, because it discounts the metaphysical. All life follows a plan; hence nothing of any significance happens without cause or reason. Either the accident was necessary for the experience or the lower mind was not receptive to higher direction. In either case, the accident would have constructive compensations. This attitude may appear fatalistic, but it is merely saying that spiritual forces are acting in the unpleasant as well as in the pleasant moments of life. We cannot deny that both are beneficial any more than we can praise the right hand and criticize the left merely because we are right-handed. Both are equally necessary, and both serve a need.

The body exhibits reactions or effects (called symptoms, disease, or illness) because that is all it is capable of expressing. It cannot perpetuate the cause of anything, being a part of the physical world. All it can do is receive and react in accordance with its quality of reception. Illness, then, is the precipitation of the emotional level into the physical due to temporary antagonism between the higher mind (what we should be doing) and the lower mind (what we are doing). We will outgrow such struggles in times to come, when a complete unification of the lower and higher aspects of the mind takes place.

Illness does not, however, indicate a false or misguided life or a total failure in our efforts toward a well-balanced life. It does indicate an imperfection, which is natural at this stage of spiritual growth. Illness can also lead to a more profound view of life. The lower mind becomes tempered and searching as a result of bodily disturbance. Its confidence and security are so shaken that it turns elsewhere for consolation. This is most often true with chronic afflictions, but all types of ill health can lead to a more serious and contemplative thought pattern.

Are illness and other forms of suffering necessary for spiritual growth? Certainly some impetus is necessary for moving man forward by breaking up crystallized ways of living and thinking. In most instances, this impetus takes the form of disease or other difficulties. Furthermore, it is not the true Self that suffers. In fact, the true Self is spiritually strengthened by the synthesis resulting from the antagonism of the conflict that takes place within the lower mind.

For eons, the lower mind has concerned itself consciously with the plane of the physical. Now, because of our evolutionary position, we are slowly rising into greater vistas of spiritual comprehension. The lower mind, through experience of life, is continually expanding and absorbing the characteristics of its higher counterpart, but, from its point of view, the great power arising from its higher contacts is foreign and repellent at first. The blending of the two aspects of our nature is not always cordial. The lower mind and body must continually reorient themselves in order to complement this higher expansion. It is much like retooling an automobile factory when a new car model is going into production. Readjustment means problems, and in some cases problems result in illness.

To the body, or more specifically, the cell, the reactions resulting from illness are creative as well as protective. What is a cell? It is more than protoplasm; it is an individual life, compounded of divinity, soul, and form. Though its limited soul-perception can express itself only in a cellular form, it is basically the same in cause and purpose as all other forms of life. All lives are but diverse aspects of the One, yet are united through common origin and purpose.

Through the process of illness and the protective effort it produces, the cell undergoes transition. Transition through experience leads to progress, and progress is spiritual advancement. Our body is an aggregate of lives (cells), which gives it a bipolarity—a blending of opposites both as an extension of divinity into matter and as a vehicle by which the cell's lower degrees of consciousness may share in the higher organization of the human structure. Therefore, even on the physical plane, illness serves a useful purpose.

All life moves toward fulfillment of a spiritual idea. The sooner we realize this, the sooner will our lives have inner purpose and direction. We must understand that all human problems have spiritual colorings despite their physical expressions. This awareness will not necessarily make one immune to disease but will give it some degree of virtue and purpose over and above its unpleasant side.

Philosophically, we cannot separate blissful and painful experiences, for both in varying degrees serve the same cause; they will last their duration and then disintegrate as naturally as they appeared. This does not mean we should seek illness as a spiritual stimulant, but when we are confronted with it, we should not lose sight of its essential nature. To seek aid for such discomforts is understandable and sometimes necessary, but with the seeking should go an awareness of the deeper vision: that the very energies that manifest disharmony are those which also give and sustain life.

Robert W. Bonnell, a Life Member of the Theosophical Society, has been a lecturer and writer on esoteric themes for over fifty years. His book, Reflections Along the Path, was published in 2006. A health practitioner for over forty years, Robert now competes in the Senior Olympics, where he has earned numerous gold medals for weight lifting. A version of this article appeared in Sunrise magazine, August-September 1990 (copyright © 1990 Theosophical University Press).

By Richard Smoley

Originally printed in the Summer 2009 issue of Quest magazine. 
Citation: Smoley, Richard. "From the Executive Editor - Summer 2009." Quest  97. 3 (Summer 2009): 82.

From time to time in my reading, I turn to some classic work of fiction that I've never gotten around to before. Recently I read Saul Bellow's novel Herzog, about a middle-aged professor whose wife runs off with his best friend.

Herzog is furious. At one point he gets an old horse pistol that had belonged to his father and goes to his ex-wife's house, intending to shoot her and her lover. But as he sees them through the window, he realizes that he will do no such thing. He goes off and eventually makes peace with his sorrow.

Herzog was published in 1964. I wonder whether a novelist writing today would be able to avoid the temptation to have Herzog use the gun. Anton Chekhov once said that you can't have a pistol onstage without having it go off. American art over the last few decades seems dedicated to the principle that pistols must be found everywhere and used at all times. This is true not only in mass culture but increasingly in the "serious" arts as well. Just today I read a New York Times review of a production of the Oresteia that features a great deal of red fluid spurting about.

Conflict is the key to drama: if you take a basic course in scriptwriting, that's the first thing you will learn. But if you watch the typical current movie or (increasingly) read the typical current novel, you'll get the impression that conflict is a spice that is dumped willy-nilly into every dish. Certain movies—Spike Lee's come to mind—have everyone shouting at one another at every possible juncture regardless of whether it's necessary to the plot or relevant to what the characters are experiencing. Other films have characters firing weapons at one another at every possible juncture.

It's easy to see why. If you're a mediocre filmmaker with little sense of plot or dialogue, you can always fill in the holes with gunfire. By now viewers have come to expect this practice as a matter of course, and a film that is lacking in bloodshed is often dismissed as slow or boring or, still worse, "foreign."

Since films remain one of our nation's chief exports even in a time of chronic trade deficits, our filmmakers are shipping this idea of America abroad. Possibly some or most of the anti-Americanism that we are seeing worldwide is the result of this image. If America is a country riddled with pimps, drug dealers, gang lords, and craven politicians beholden to them, and if we are a people who have to keep pistols in our nightstands so that we can sleep in peace, who would want to be like us? Who would not want to keep American influence at bay?

Nor is it just a matter of how we look to the world at large. One adage says that you become what you behold, so violence has become a central element in our self-definition as Americans. We still imagine ourselves as a nation of pioneers who must keep rifles over our hearths to fight off the savages—or, if you prefer, wary vigilantes holed up against the gangsters and psychopaths beating down our doors.

The usual punch line to this sort of reflection is that images of violence propagate real violence and that we must do something about this explosion of criminality on our viewing screens. Impose stricter rating standards, perhaps? Ban violence from TV? Unfortunately, such editorializing has gone on for decades with no result whatsoever.

I would like to suggest something different. We need to see that violence has become an artistic cliche. Like all cliches, it has simply become uninteresting. If you've seen one car chase through a crowded city, you've seen them all. If you've heard one movie gangster threaten a hero tied to a chair, you've heard them all. They are all the same, and all are incredibly tiresome: the clever heists, the drug deals gone bad, the sadistic hoodlums, the misfit cops who throw out the rules and do it their own way. The changes have all been rung on bloodshed, American style.

What's the point of this discussion? It's quite simple. People are, like it or not, herd animals, and by and large they (or rather we) follow the crowd. In the America of 2009, where attention spans are shrinking to nanolevels, there is nothing worse than being "so last year." It's time to move the crowd in another direction by bestowing upon violence the most poisonous of all stigmas: that of being passé. Brutality in our cultural imagination will not end with a bang or for that matter with a whimper, but we may be able to end it with a yawn.

Richard Smoley
Executive Editor

By Jonathan Ellerby

Originally printed in the Summer 2009 issue of Quest magazine. 
Citation: Ellerby, Jonathan. "The Path of Service." Quest  97. 3 (Summer 2009): 90-94.

The elevator moved slowly to the fourth floor. It was big enough for the wheelchairs and hospital beds that came in and out all day. Since my visits were in the evening hours, however, I was often the only one aboard. I stared at the outdated wood veneer and faded chrome handrails. The dingy floor and doors showed decades of wear and tear, and the occasional moans of the gears reminded me of its history—once shiny, promising, and new.

I always said a prayer as I rode up to the spinal cord injury and amputee unit at the rehabilitation hospital. I wanted to be prepared for an evening of visiting and for bittersweet surprises that might be waiting. When the elevator doors opened, I could feel myself entering a new world.

It was quiet at night—strangely quiet—and the halls were sterile, white, aged. The day was done, and there was a different mood emerging as patients settled in for rest and the staff retreated for the day. A new rhythm emerged: the distant sound of a television, the occasional sharp tone from a computer monitor, the soft ring of a phone in the nursing station.

Staff members were friendly, attentive, and kind; and patients were typically subdued, mostly contemplative, depressed, or tired from the day's physical therapy. They were there because of something serious—something life-altering. Sadly, a surprising number of people on this unit of dramatic and extreme injuries and illnesses were under thirty-five years of age.

Perhaps the inner-city location played a role or perhaps it was the fact that patients from the surrounding rural region were funneled there for the comprehensive services offered at this site. The unit contained an amazing cross-section of society: old, young, diabetics, accident survivors, surgery casualties. A disproportionate presence of Native American and low-income people filled the beds.

Many lived in this rehabilitation hospital for several months; few were there for relatively short stints. Because of the long stays and complicated circumstances, it was an ideal and often challenging place to provide spiritual counseling and emotional support. As part of my chaplaincy training, I'd selected this unit to do volunteer work because I needed to accumulate hours of practice, but more from a deeper need to give back—a desire to serve a community of people who seemed to have little support.

The unit manager was a wonderful and ambitious woman who wanted more for her patients, but the hospital's budget restricted psychosocial care to a minimum. It was my pleasure to offer extra hours. When I began, I felt a sense of valiant pride. I had a secret ambition to be "the one to go the extra mile" in order to help the "less fortunate." I recall my first visit. Only hours after I began my work, it became clear that I'd greatly underestimated my task. I'd also underestimated the costs...and the rewards.

During my first week of visits, I met Vera, a Native American woman who changed my life. She was from a small Cree Nation community in central Manitoba, Canada, and she was dangerously overweight. Vera was in her mid-sixties, but she appeared much older, as she clearly bore the ill effects of a life full of challenge, loss, and chronic health problems. I examined her medical chart and created an image of her in my mind, but when I entered her room, I was shocked.

It took me months before I could fully grasp the overwhelming reality of a body that was truly in decay and deterioration. This was the beginning of that adjustment. Vera's complexion was ashen, she looked exhausted, her size was of concern, and the empty space in the bed where her leg used to be was a sign of worse things to come. There was a faint sickly odor in the dark room, which was scarcely illuminated by a reading light beside her bed. The other bed in the room was empty. The winter night outside was cold and black.

I was a bit nervous as I entered the room and introduced myself. I asked simple questions about her well-being and mood. Vera struck me as a kind of medical iceberg in that even to the untrained eye, it was obvious that any conditions identified were only a visible fraction of an immense complexity at work in her body and life.

I sensed myself already pulling away from her emotionally, and somewhere in the back of my mind, I could feel my heroic intentions diminishing. Rationalizations about why I probably shouldn't spend much time with this patient slowly surfaced. They attempted to hide my growing discomfort.

To my surprise, Vera responded to my presence and was far less reserved than many of the other Native American people I'd worked with in hospital settings. At first she was quiet and just stared at me, and as I ran out of pleasantries, we gazed at each other awkwardly. Vera looked away, and I felt that I'd overstayed my welcome. I immediately thought about leaving, but then she reached out.

"It's nice you came. I'm very lonely here," she said in a faint voice with a Cree accent. She cleared her throat a lot.

"No one comes to see me. My kids live and work back home, and it's so far away that none of them can make the trip. They have their own problems to deal with anyway. My eldest boy used to live in the city here. He would have come to see me, but he was killed two years ago in an accident." She paused and closed her eyes as if to swallow the pain of the memory.

"My husband is gone, too. He died of diabetes. It's been five years." She paused again. Pointing to the empty space in her bed beneath the sheets where her right leg was removed, she continued: "That's why they took this: diabetes. They want to take the other one now.

"How will I get around? Back home on the reservation, most of our streets are still unpaved. There's just dirt. When it rains, you can't get a wheelchair through the mud. But I can't stay here either—it's too lonely in the city. My husband didn't want surgery. He was a fisherman all his life and always worked so hard. He only came to the city once—to the hospital. But he never returned. When he found out how sick he was, he drank himself to death. I never drank. I went to church almost every day to pray for him. I tried to get him to go with me, but I guess we never did get along."

She paused as her breathing became strained. "I always went to church, since I was little. I think he hated that about me. It made him feel guilty about his drinking, so he used to beat me up. I couldn't stop going, though, because it was the only place I felt safe.

"He was always drinking, always angry. And it just got worse at the end. I guess I knew it would be like that, but I'd always hoped it would turn out differently."

There was such sadness in her eyes, and I was at a complete loss for words. The immensity of her pain was more than I could bear. Most patients take their time to share such intimate details about their lives. In the hospital where the majority of my visits were unannounced and unrequested, people usually needed time to build a sense of rapport and connection. Then they'd eventually begin to open up more. Vera was different.

I was thinking about all those visits with patients, always wishing they'd share sooner. I never realized, however, that the timing was really to my benefit. I was unprepared for the sudden and intense nature of Vera's story, and it left me reeling. Up to that point in my training, I'd helped people face many of life's traumas and setbacks. But it was still all new to me, and this was too much and too honest—abuse, loss, illness, poverty, isolation. Then I remembered my commitment: service would be my gift, my path.

So I pulled a chair over to her bed, and we quietly sat together. Vera stared at the ceiling. I recalled a practice that I thought might help me feel better, if not her as well. I closed my eyes for a moment and imagined my heart as a large, glowing pink rosebud. Then I took some slow, deep breaths into my belly and imagined it opening into a radiant bloom. I said a little prayer asking for her healing and comfort and visualized a soft white light shining out from my heart to hers. I pictured a beautiful light of healing surrounding her.

Vera turned to me and smiled as I opened my eyes. Her eyes were bright, and she said, "Thank you. Can we say the Lord's Prayer together?" I was caught off guard. It was as if she felt the "energy" I was sending.

"Of course," I replied, and we began reciting, "Our Father, who art in heaven. . . ."

We held hands as Vera led the prayer, her voice growing stronger with each word. When we came to the end, I paused and she continued praying for healing for her grandchildren, children, and community. She prayed for her husband's peace in the Spirit and for the ability to forgive him. She prayed for me and the "hard work of the heart" that I was doing. She prayed for all the people in the hospital—staff and patients. Finally, she prayed for herself. I was moved by the sincerity and generosity of her wishes for me, a stranger. I felt myself choke up with emotion.

"I haven't been able to pray since I got here," she said. "I felt like maybe my life was a failure and that God was disappointed in me. This place can feel so empty. No Spirit. But you came, and I can feel that you care. You want to do what's right. It makes me feel like I am worth something. People do care, don't they? God didn't forget about me. You're the proof!"

My hopes of being a hero dissolved in a wave of deep humility. I was embarrassed for the ways I'd judged Vera in my mind when I had first arrived. I felt her unconditional acceptance despite just having met me. I found myself aware of an awakening in her—and in me as well. As her mood changed, I saw a twinkle in her eye. I felt a sweetness in her voice and presence. As she spoke of her gratitude for my company, I felt myself falling under the spell of compassion that was growing between us.

As I gazed at Vera, I saw images of her at different ages floating through my mind. I saw her as a young mother, a beautiful child, and as an active member of her community. I saw story after story flow through me—a gentle stream of thoughts and feelings.

"Vera," I said, putting my hand on the remaining part of her amputated leg, which was missing from the knee down, "God is not punishing you, and you haven't disappointed anyone. Life isn't easy, and it rarely goes the way we expect. But there's always hope, always change, and always something greater to remember and stay connected to. It's a choice, isn't it?

"I know that your children want you home, and your community misses you as much as you miss them. If we're going to get you back soon, you can help by lifting your own spirit. 'Standing tall' is something we feel inside; it's not about your legs or how fast you move. Try to pray more, and think of the good times that might be waiting ahead. What else can you do with the time you have? Remember springtime at home, and the fresh smell of rain on those muddy country roads."

She smiled and held my hand tightly as I got up to go. "You'll come back?" she asked.

"Of course. Every time I'm here." And I did. I visited her every time I was on the unit. She and I became friends, and her mood and energy steadily lifted. Even though she had to have part of her other leg amputated, I watched the changes in her attitude and saw her resilience grow from one visit to another.

One day when I arrived on the unit, one of the nurses stopped me in the hallway and asked me to be sure to visit Vera. I asked if she was OK. The nurse explained that she'd been doing well emotionally but was experiencing pain in her newly amputated leg.

"Every time you visit," the nurse explained, "her discomfort goes away. We don't have to give her any pain meds for at least twelve hours or more after you leave. When you aren't here, though, she needs them every four hours. Whatever you're doing, keep doing it!"

I was surprised to hear this and felt honored, but I knew in my heart that I wasn't doing anything for Vera. She was doing it, and a Higher Power was at work. Her faith, prayers, and commitment to see the positive whenever possible was her medicine. I was just the lucky person who got to be a part of it.

Love All, Serve All

Vera helped me see that every person—no matter how sick, broken, sad, or angry—has a story and a precious heart within. We all have a tender soul and a life of memories. Each of us lives with the longing to be in the presence of love. As that love in me grew for Vera, I found it easier to "turn it on" for others in need. I found that when I left the hospital, all the love and attention I thought I'd "given away" was somehow still within me. Even after some of the hardest days, I felt tremendous love and gratitude. As I gave, I received.

After I met Vera, I never left depleted or depressed about the suffering I encountered. I walked to my car and made the drive home with a sense of awe and gratitude. I felt filled with love and privileged to be part of the healing journey of so many. Instead of despair, I found myself awakening to the spirit of God and the goodness in all things. The sacred isn't just in nature, beauty, and good fortune. It also resides in hard times, sad occasions, and tragedies—maybe more so. I found light in the darkest moments, hope in the broken, and lessons from the lost. The miracle of love and service is like a lit candle. It can light the flame of other candles. The flame burns without going out or being diminished, no matter how many new candles it lights. This is the path of service.

My practice of service allowed me to realize that the presence of the sacred can be in all things, in all people, and at all times. Good or bad, happy or sad, healthy or sick, we can feel the presence and power of a higher love and wisdom that is there for everyone who reaches for it, regardless of culture or religious beliefs. Giving of myself to others gave me more than I could have ever imagined.

The essence of the path of service is the desire to honor the sacred in the created world through a commitment to help and heal. Rather than turning our attention and energy to an intangible force or experience, we seek to know the sacred in the everyday moments of our lives. We choose an act, a career, or a type of volunteer work through which we can show our devotion and express our gratitude. The writings and recorded lectures of the celebrated American spiritual teacher and healer Ram Dass were profoundly helpful and instructive in my exploration of the path of service. To this day, I recommend his book How Can I Help? to anyone interested in this practice.

Get Involved

The path of service isn't about writing checks to charities or recycling waste at home (although both are important actions). The path of service involves openhearted action—that is, rolling up your sleeves and getting your hands dirty. It's about caring for and working with others without a desire for reward or compensation. It's about being a part of the healing of this world with the awareness that in true healing there's no hierarchy—there's no line to be drawn between the helper and the helped. All people can be healers, and everyone is in need at times.

Your path of service could involve working with children or animals or even healing the environment. You may also wish to help those who are battling poverty, illness, or loneliness. There's no limit to the myriad situations and causes that require support. The key is to give yourself freely, without any self-serving intentions. Honor the sacred in yourself and what you serve. You might volunteer your time, talent, labor, or experience. The path of service simply asks that you make your service an intentional and regular commitment.

Don't let the simplicity of the practice deceive you. To serve without judgment or attachment will test you in many ways. The harshness and injustice of life can defy logic; true service may make you uncomfortable at times. It's always easier to do nothing or claim that the practice isn't right for you. Despite the reasons for resistance, the path of service promises a personal experience of the transformative power of the human spirit. When you seek to love and serve all, you'll find miracles in every step you take.

Much the way Vera taught me years ago, the path of service is about learning to live from the heart. I didn't have to do much to help her. I just had to be honest with myself and fully present with her. I had to trust that I'd never have all the answers, and that would be good enough. To be able to walk with others in the face of life's tragedy and mystery with our hearts vulnerable and eyes open is the cultivation of spiritual awakening.

You Are the Gift

The greatest gift we have to offer is our presence: unconditional, loving, and affirming what is. In service, we come face to face with the Spirit of life and know its astounding capacity to triumph, as well as its delicateness in the midst of uncertainty. If we look at what we resist when we serve, in time it will set us free.

The way we help heal ourselves is a precious dance. Reflecting on his life and the relationship between service and spirituality, Ram Dass commented, "I am arriving at that circle where one works on oneself as a gift to other people so that one doesn't create more suffering. I help people as I work on myself and I work on myself to help people."

Jonathan Ellerby holds a doctorate in comparative religion and is spiritual program director for the Canyon Ranch Resorts. This article is excerpted from his book Return to the Sacred: Ancient Pathways to Spiritual Awakening, published in January 2009. Reprinted with permission of Hay House.

VOLUME 97, NUMBER 3

Losing My Religion
By Jay Kinney

The Path of Scared Service
By Jonathan Ellerby

Enlightenment: Elements of Self-Care
By Martha Libster

Why Forgive?
By Richard Smoley

Explorations:
Illness As Spiritual Experience
By Robert W. Bonnell

From the Archives:
Theosophy in Times of War
By Janet Kerschner

From the Executive Editor
Richard Smoley

Viewpoint: The Story to Tell
By Betty Bland