The Builders

By Judith Buchanan

Originally printed in the March - April 2005 issue of Quest magazine. 
Citation: Buchanan, Judith. "The Builders." Quest  93.2 (MARCH - APRIL 2005):51-52

 

There's a long white robe up in heaven for me
There's a big gold harp up in heaven for me
And I touch one string, and the whole heavens ring
And I ain't gonna be here much longer.

In my mind, I could hear my dad's clear tenor voice, harmonizing with the family, singing one of our favorite spirituals. The song played and the tears flowed as I drove the family eastward. A few hours earlier, I had received the call no one wants to hear: "He's in the hospital . . .pancreatic cancer . . .a few hours or days to live. Come home now." It had to be a mistake. Just a few days earlier he had returned feeling fine from a vacation in Japan and China. It had to be something like liver flukes from bad water. The doctors were wrong.

As I drove, I began invoking the healing angels to minister to him. Then I got a picture in my head, as if on a TV screen. It was an image of my father in the hospital room, plugged into the usual medical paraphernalia. My sister and stepmother were there with the nurses and a doctor. Then I saw that there were beings that looked like pillars of light standing all around my father. They were not like any angels I'd ever seen before. "Okay," I thought, "he has guardians. He,s going to be all right."

When I arrived at the hospital, Dad,s room was exactly as I had visualized it. The family left me alone with him, and I started to work. I briefly greeted and thanked the light-column beings, then began an absolute frenzy of prayer work with a group of healing angels. We dove in, pulling the bad cells out of his body, flooding him with light and love. Suddenly I felt a firm force pressing me and the healing angels away from my father. I was driven from the room by the light-column beings. They spoke to me: "You may not come back until you are calm."

Out in the hallway, dealing with surging emotions—grief, anger, confusion—it was very difficult to meditate, but after several hours I found that place within, "the peace that passeth understanding." I ventured back into the room, humble, respectful now. The beings were still standing exactly as they had been: tall pillars like beams of light whose "heads" went beyond the ceiling. I could see no features, but each had a distinct presence. "Who are you?" I asked.

One replied, "You would call us Builders."

"Builders" didn't mean anything to me, but I surrendered to their terms of maintaining a calm, loving watch over my dad, just as they seemed to be doing. As my sister and I traded twelve-hour shifts to nurse our father, I saw an amazing transformation in the Builders. Over several days, as they stood where they had been encircling Dad's bed, their bodies seemed to spread out sideways until they joined. From outside the circle their joined bodies now looked like a huge white cone of light whose point extended through the ceiling. When I was beside my father inside the Builders, circle, their shape resembled a long white tunnel. And there at the end of the tunnel, in a scene Disney could have staged, were my grandfather and grandmother, smiling, waving, and assuring me they would stay there to meet their youngest child, my dad.

A few days later, another change occurred. A golden cord of light was wound around the outside of the cone, spiraling from the base to the tip. The cord seemed to have a beautiful tone that filled the room.

Those days of nursing my dear father were the sweetest and most poignant of my life. Dad had given us all so much love. This was my chance to return a little. It seemed like I was ministering to the body of the helpless infant Jesus and the torn and dying Lord at the same time. On the tenth day I was asked to do what I thought was an impossible task. It wasn't enough to peacefully accept my father,s dying; I was asked to help Dad cross over. At last leaving behind all hope of what I wanted in order to be true and obedient to a will much greater and better than my own, I imaged picking Dad up.

As I carried my father's cancer-ravished body through the tunnel, I finally understood the words of that old Negro spiritual our family used to sing. A person traveling through the tunnel and emerging through the top would seem to be wearing a long white robe. The gold harp was the single strand that wound around the outside of the cone with a tone so sweet that "the whole heavens ring" in resonance. Their work completed, the Builders gradually disappeared.

I've seen the Builders again in the hospital rooms of dying patients. Then I know it,s not a time for healing activity but for quiet, peaceful support. And I let the beautiful words of that spiritual sing in my mind.


Judith Buchanan is an active member of the Ann Arbor lodge in Michigan.


Parenting and Spirituality: Can There Be Harmony?

Originally printed in the March - April 2002 issue of Quest magazine.
Citation: Hebert, Barbara. "Parenting and Spirituality: Can There Be Harmony?." Quest  90.2 (MARCH - APRIL 2002):44-47, 63.

By Barbara B. Hebert

Theosophical Society - Barbara B. Hebert currently serves as president of the Theosophical Society in America.  She has been a mental health practitioner and educator for many years.Parenting is not a subject discussed very often in Theosophical circles, yet many Theosophists are parents. Perhaps the lack of discussion is due to a seeming dichotomy between spirituality and parenting. When I think of someone who is spiritual, I imagine a person sitting quietly and meditating, centered in the midst of strife and difficulties, studying the ancient wisdom, and contemplating metaphysical truths. When I think of a parent, I visualize someone falling asleep while trying to meditate, too busy to sit quietly, living with strife and difficulties (without being centered), and whose only contact with what is ancient is the way the parent feels at the end of a long day. Are spirituality and parenting dichotomous? Or can they come together?

Kahlil Gibran writes:

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with
His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the Archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Gibran speaks to the hearts of parents who recognize the spirituality inherent in their children and in themselves. His words touch a cord within many who desire to raise their children in an environment filled with harmony and an understanding of the universality of all life, who desire to provide opportunities by which their children can fulfill their dharma. Yet, Gibran's words, though beautiful as well as thought-provoking, may not always speak to parents involved in the nitty-gritty details of everyday life.

Think of an advertisement in a newspaper's help-wanted pages:

Wanted: Strong multi-tasked individual who can fulfill the duties of housekeeper, cook, nurse, and chauffeur. Must be able to mediate arguments, fights, and disagreements at all hours of the day and night. Individual must be willing to repeat instructions, stories, rules, etc. ad infinitum. Must place own life on hold to cater to needs of others. No vacation, no time off, hours are 24/7. No pay.

In the experience of many people, that advertisement describes parenting more realistically than does Gibran. Does such experience explain why parenting and spirituality are seldom discussed together? Is it impossible to be spiritual while also being chief cook and bottle washer, mediating arguments, and wishing for a night of undisturbed sleep, all at the same time? Or can we bring together both Gibran's words and the reality of parenting?

Parenting is in fact applied Theosophy, applied spirituality. Parenting presents us with an opportunity to grow spiritually by focusing on aspects of ourselves that may otherwise go "unscrubbed" for several lifetimes. Through parenting we face the internal struggle of wanting to live a spiritual life. We face the internal struggle of wanting to be the best possible parent for these children who are, as Gibran says, not our children, who have their own karmic lessons to learn and their own dharma to fulfill. And we face the internal struggle of realizing that we are less than the perfect spiritual beings and perfect parents we wish to be.

As parents, we struggle daily with our own needs and wants—spiritually, psychologically, and physically—and we likewise struggle with our children, as they strive to meet their own needs and wants. We do not want to hinder their individuality or stifle their psycho-spiritual growth; yet, on the other hand, we are the parents who need to set boundaries to provide a safe environment. We want our children to grow into loving, compassionate, caring individuals, but how do we encourage such qualities? Is there a way for us to become parents who manage to walk the razor-edged path of providing a healthy psycho-spiritual environment for our children while living in the "real world"?

Diana Baumrind, a social scientist and researcher, has created a model of parenting styles that addresses the issue of parenting in a psycho-spiritual sense. She looks at two primary factors: (1) the demands that the parent makes on the child (including expectations for appropriate, mature behavior, requirements for being a part of the family as a whole, willingness to confront the child if necessary, and willingness to discipline the child) and (2) the responsiveness of the parent to the needs of the child (including the encouragement of independence, assertiveness, and self-regulation by the child). Using these two factors of demandingness and responsiveness, Baumrind identifies four different parenting styles: indulgent, authoritarian, authoritative, and uninvolved.

Indulgent parents (who are also called permissive or nondirective) tend to demand little of their child while being very responsive. These parents are lenient with the child, allowing much self-regulation and requiring little maturity on the part of the child. Indulgent parents tend to avoid confrontation with their child. They have few rules and provide very little structure. These parents encourage their children to make their own rules. They are inclined to say, "I'm not going to raise my children with all those stupid rules my parents gave me!"

Authoritarian parents tend to be highly demanding and directive, but they are not very responsive to the needs of the child. They are parent-centered and expect their instructions to be obeyed without question or explanation. Authoritarian parents tend to be controlling and rigid in their rules and expectations. In other words, authoritarian parents are most likely to say, "It's my way or the highway, young person." Children who grow up in that sort of environment are rarely allowed to create their own rules and structure, a restriction that may cause difficulty when the children find themselves in a situation with no clear directives.

Authoritative parents are both demanding and responsive. These parents impart clear rules and structure, but they are not restrictive. They encourage assertiveness and independence on the part of the child as well as responsible and appropriately self-regulated behavior. They are neither child-centered nor parent-centered. The focus of the authoritative parent is on the needs of the family as a whole. Authoritative parents create rules and structure that provide a feeling of well-being and security for the child. Authoritative parents are also willing to discuss rules with the child, to compromise in certain situations, and to allow the child some latitude in creating rules when the child is mature enough to do so. These parents expect the child to participate with the family as a whole and to recognize the needs of other family members as well. Family meetings or discussions are frequently an integral aspect of authoritative parenting.

Finally, the uninvolved parents are neither demanding nor responsive. Parents who are uninvolved generally provide no structure, discipline, or supervision for their children. In the worst-case scenario, these parents may even neglect or reject their children. Frequently these children feel abandoned.

Baumrind's model of parenting styles can be extended into a more spiritual dimension. Parents who are committed to a spiritual way of life want their children to be assertive, independent, and able to regulate themselves and their behavior. They want their children to experience success, not necessarily in a strongly material sense (although most parents will surely agree that it is important for children to be able to support themselves when they are grown). They want their children to grow, learn, and expand their horizons. Baumrind's model of parenting can supply guidelines to help parents reach these goals—and thus to serve as Gibran's stable bow.

A great deal of research has investigated these parenting styles (as the references at the end of this article indicate). This research indicates that the parenting style with the best impact on children is the authoritative one, which impacts the academic, social, and psychological well being of children in positive ways. With its consistent rules and boundaries, its attention to both demandingness and responsiveness, and its emphasis on the attainment of assertiveness, independence, and self-regulation, authoritative parenting seems to provide a strong environment of stability and safety for the child, thus allowing parents to be Gibran's stable bow.

One of the most important aspects of authoritative parenting, as well as of spiritual parenting, is to impart clear and consistent rules and structure to children. A lack of rules means a lack of boundaries. A lack of boundaries means a lack of safety. Most of us at some time have found ourselves not knowing what was going to happen next or what we were expected to do. Do you remember the anxiety it produced? The same is true for children.

A two-year-old needs rules and boundaries—not to run into a busy street or touch a hot stove. These rules are for the child's safety. As the child grows, clear and consistent rules and boundaries continue to provide a safe and stable environment. And as the child matures, it is reasonable to encourage discussion and negotiation regarding rules. In this way, we can slowly help our children learn to regulate their own behavior, and that learning has a positive impact on their self-esteem.

Being honest and open with the child about our feelings allows the child to have a clearer understanding of the world. Talking and—most important—listening to our children, thus allowing them to become a part of the decision-making process (within carefully structured boundaries), clearly signals that the parent perceives the child as a valued individual, a person whose opinion is important. These messages and their inherent impact are exactly what we strive to impart as spiritual parents.

Certainly, it seems very simple to have clear boundaries, to be consistent, to allow our children to participate in decision-making, to talk and listen to our children in order to impart valuable messages. However, the reality is not quite that simple. A few examples of authoritative parenting may be useful. Your 12-year-old daughter wants to go to the movies with friends. She asks you to pick her up thirty minutes after the movie ends. She explains that she wants to visit with her friends after the movie. Many parents may be uncomfortable with this scenario. A discussion of the pros and cons of the situation is reasonable. You and your daughter may decide to compromise and allow her to stay for fifteen minutes after the movie has ended provided she does not leave the front of the movie theater.

In another example, your ten-year-old son wants to spend the night with a friend whose parents do not supervise as well as you would prefer. You do not allow him to do so. Discussing this issue with your child, specifically your concerns about the kind of difficulties that may ensue because of the lack of supervision, as well as specifically naming your fear of his being hurt or getting in trouble, is not only appropriate, but clarifies for your child that decisions are made for his safety. Discussion and possible compromise allow the child to begin to learn self-regulation. Rules, structure, consistency, discussion, and compromise are important aspects of parenting and of providing an environment for our children that not only feels but actually is safe and secure.

Living in a stable environment that is safe and secure allows children the freedom to assert their independence. Consciously or unconsciously, children know that the boundaries are provided in order to protect them. Therefore, they are willing to venture forth, knowing that their parents are providing an invisible safety net in case they fall. They learn how to make good decisions. They learn to express all aspects of their personality and to develop into the Self they are meant to become. It is from their decisions and possible mistakes—underlain by the safety and security that we provide—that our children learn and grow into Gibran's swift arrow. It is from providing an environment that is stable and safe that we become the stable bow. Our children meet their dharma as we meet ours.

Do our children fight rules and structures? Of course. Will they use every argument and manipulation they can to change our minds? Absolutely. Do they want the rules and structure? Surprisingly yes, although they will not admit it until they are adults. The boundaries—along with the discussion, the negotiation, and the compromise—provide the safe environment from which our children proceed forth into Gibran's "house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams." Through consistent authoritative parenting, we can meet the spiritual and psychological needs of both our children and ourselves. Being both demanding of our children and responsive to their needs provides the framework through which they can flower into the unique individuals they are meant to become. It is through boundaries, discussion, negotiation, and compromise that we begin to bring together both the realities of the daily struggle of parenting and the beauty of being the stable bow that sends our children forth.

References

Baumrind,

Diana. "Current Patterns of Parental Authority." Developmental Psychology 4(1971): 1–103.

———.

"The Influence of Parenting Style on Adolescent Competence and Substance Use." Journal of Early Adolescence 11 (1991): 56–95.

———.

"Rearing Competent Children." In Child Development Today and Tomorrow, ed. W. Damon, 349–78. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 1989.

Gibran, Kahlil. The Prophet. New York: Knopf, 1982.



Barbara B. Hebert, MEd, LPC, is a third-generation Theosophist who has been a member of theTheosophical Society for more than twenty-five years. She has worked as a staff member at both Olcott, the national center of the Theosophical Society in America (where her oldest son, Jason, was born) and at the Krotona Institute of Theosophy (where her youngest son, Chad, was born). Barbara works as a school counselor and a licensed professional counselor in Covington, Louisiana.


Thinking Aloud: Strength or Weakness?

Originally printed in the March - April 2002 issue of Quest magazine.
Citation: Burnier, Radha. "Strength or Weakness?." Quest  90.2 (MARCH - APRIL 2002):66.

By Radha Burnier


(extracted from "On the Watch-Tower" in the Theosophist, November 2001)

Theosophical Society - Radha Burnier was the president of the international Theosophical Society from 1980 till her death in 2013. The daughter of N. Sri Ram, who was president of the international Theosophical Society from 1953 to 1973, she was an associate of the great spiritual teacher J. KrishnamurtiEvery earnest member of the Theosophical Society should know clearly that the Society does not offer a theology or dogma, a god, guru, or authority; it does not impose beliefs or encourage dependence. As Annie Besant stated, "We hold that Truth should be sought by study, by reflection, by purity of life, by devotion to high ideals." If the Theosophical Society were to offer a less daunting path to follow and were to set up a succession of gurus, preferably identifiable by means of vestments, pronouncements, and trappings, it might attract a much larger number of people to its fold. But what purpose would it serve?

There are persons who would like to see the Society's membership grow fast and its popularity increase.They want to please the public with psychologically comforting things that have little or nothing to do with the universal brotherhood which is the main Object of the Society, or with the common search and aspiration for truth that binds the far-flung Sections and members together spiritually in an affectionate bond of union. They regard it as a weakness in the Society that it does not cater to the wants of the public and change its aims to gain popularity.

The Society's clear policy is not to entertain the world with what it wants, but to aid people to discover the source of wisdom within themselves. This is not a weakness, but a strength. As the Mahatmas have stated, the Society's aim is not to instill belief and dependence, but "to teach man virtue for its own sake, and to walk in life relying on himself instead of leaning on a theological crutch, that for countless ages was the direct cause of nearly all human misery." This statement by the one known as KH is reinforced by his Adept friend M, who wrote to a member: "A constant sense of abject dependence upon a Deity [we might also say a guru] which he regards as the sole source of power, makes a man lose all self-reliance and the spurs to activity and initiative."

As the universe is governed by law in the grosser as well as the subtler planes of existence, and because cause and effect are inextricably connected, each person receives only what he or she merits. Following the Theosophical path means that by study, reflection, purity of life, and unselfish devotion to high ideals, enlightenment must be earned.

The Society's uncompromising policy is and must remain one of encouraging, not belief, but enquiry; not dependence on god or guru, but faith in the light of spiritual intelligence within one's own heart, and the determination to let that light shine by adopting the well-tested means to disperse the darkness of the selfish and ignorant mind.


 

Radha Burnier, who was born at Adyar, the Theosophical Society's international headquarters in India, is in her fourth term as international President of the Society. She has a Master of Arts degree in Sanskrit studies from Benares Hindu University and an honorary doctorate from Nagarjuna University. As a young woman she was an exponent of Indian classical dance, playing a major dramatic and dance role in the critically acclaimed Renoir film The River.


Viewpoint: Wild Bells

Originally printed in the March - April 2002 issue of Quest magazine.
Citation:Algeo, John. "Wild Bells." Quest  90.2 (MARCH - APRIL 2002):42.

viewpoint

John Algeo, National President


Theosophical Society - John Algeo was a Professor Emeritus of English at the University of Georgia. He was a Theosophist and a Freemason He was the Vice President of the Theosophical Society Adyar. [This viewpoint was written a few days before New Year's Day, 2002. It is published in this issue of the Quest because, as noted below, March 1 was the old New Year's Day.]

Ring out, wild bells, to the wild sky,
    The flying cloud, the frosty light:
     The year is dying in the night:
Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.

—from In Memoriam, by Alfred Lord Tennyson

New Year's is an odd holiday. It is certainly a secular event, yet it comes just at the midpoint of the Christmas season, half way between Christmas Day and Twelfth Night. That apparently chance positioning of the secular holiday in the midst of a sacred season (if chance there be) calls for some rumination about both festivals.

As the gospeler Luke tells it, Christmas is the feast of the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem, the city of David, witnessed only by shepherds, who came from the nearby fields at the announcement of an angel. It is a humble and inward— or backward—looking story, connected with ancient Jewish prophecy and the folkways of Judea. The story Luke tells is the basis of the Christmas feast of the Nativity in the Church calendar.

As Matthew tells the story, there is a different emphasis, for he speaks of the Magi—wise men—who, at the token of a star, came from the east bearing gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. Gold is an emblem of royalty, frankincense is an offering to God, and myrrh is used to embalm dead bodies, so the three gifts betoken kingship, divinity, and mortality: Christ the messianic king of Israel, Christ the Son of God, and Christ the human being subject to death like all humanity. Matthew's account is the basis for the feast of Twelfth Night or Epiphany.

The term "epiphany" means, etymologically, "a manifestation or showing forth," specifically the manifestation of Christ to the non-Jews or gentiles. Whereas the Nativity is about how Christ came to Israel, the Epiphany is about how the gentiles came to Christ. So Christmas is Jewish-centered, and Epiphany is gentile-centered. And smack-dab between the two comes New Year's Day. What do we make of positioning this secular holiday in the bosom of a sacred holy season?

New Year's day marks the beginning of a new year, a fresh start, a clean slate. The customs of our time call for celebrating the departure of the doddery senile Old Year and the arrival of the bright infant New Year, for making resolutions to lead a new life, for ushering in the future with parties, songs, and toasts, and for making noises and ringing bells. It is a very secular event.

The positioning of secular New Year's between sacred Christmas and Epiphany says something very important, namely, that our ordinary, materialist, secular life is not something apart from the spiritual; it is embedded in the sacred. There is really no distinction between the sacred and the secular. There is only a difference in the way we regard them. For all that is, is holy. That's what "holy" means: "wholly." To be whole, entire, all-inclusive is to be holy. To be fragmented, divided, and exclusive is to be un-whole and unholy.

Part of the problem in the world today is that some of us, especially in the West, think of the of the secular as something evil and suppose that the sacred requires a narrowly exclusive view of life and a theocratic rule of society. But that is simply to convert what should be sacred into a different form of secularism and thus to fragment humanity yet further. For the universe indeed to turn as one, we must not try to homogenize it to our particular view, but rejoice in multiplicity, recognizing that variety in the world can be dedicated to holiness.

The positioning of New Year's between the ethnically focused Christmas and the internationally focused Epiphany makes a double point. It says that the secular rests in the bosom of the sacred and can be understood only in a sacred context. But just as important, perhaps in these days even more important, it says that a new year, with its fresh beginning, calls for a resolution of the ancient antagonism between narrow ethnicity and wide universality. Clannishness must give way to world unity, sectarianism to ecumenicism, narrow focus to wide vision. A universe of concord requires no less.

New Year's Day has not always been January 1. The year once began in March, as the names of the months September, October, November, and December indicate. Those names mean etymologically the seventh, eighth, ninth, and tenth months, as indeed they were when the year started with March. Only when January and February got put at the head of the year did the count go wrong.

The change of the first month from March to January has its own meaning for our time. March is the month devoted to Mars, the god of war. January is the month devoted to Janus, the god of endings and beginnings, of doorways (which are in the charge of janitors), and hence of life-passages or initiations and of new births. We too need to move our new beginnings from martial March to initiatory January. A universe of peace requires no less.

We welcome in the new year by ringing bells, especially church bells. The traditional method is called "change ringing," a practice in which a complete peal consists of ringing a set of bells in every possible order and not ringing the same order of bells more than once. If the set consists of 4 bells, there are 24 possible permutations for ringing them, and all those permutations can be rung in about half a minute. The more bells, the more complex the permutations and the longer the time required for ringing the changes. With 5 bells, there are 120 possible permutations; with 6 bells, 720 permutations; with 7 bells, 5,040 permutations—the practical limit on what can be rung. With 12 bells, the number of permutations would be 479,001,600 and the time required to ring them all would be about 40 years.

Changes have no tune, so are not melodic. But they follow an absolutely regular mathematical sequence. To the untrained ear, they sound disorderly, chaotic, or "wild." So it is probably to the ringing of changes on New Year's Eve that Tennyson was referring in section 106 of his elegy In Memoriam, whose first stanza is cited as an epigraph to these thoughts. Although the changes may seem "wild" or chaotic, they are in fact highly structured, intricately and complexly ordered. Within their seeming wildness is the most exquisite system.

The ringing of changes is a metaphor for life. What we see around us may seem chaotic and wild, but does so only because we have untrained ears, eyes, and minds. We expect to find our little tunes and melodies played back to us by nature, and fail to recognize the far greater order in nature's changes. To those who know, the wildness of life disappears into an exquisite system. So Tennyson concludes section 106 of In Memoriam thus:

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
     Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
     The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.

Ring out the grief that saps the mind,
     For those that here we see no more;
     Ring out the feud of rich and poor,
Ring in redress to all mankind.

Ring out a slowly dying cause,
     And ancient forms of party strife;
     Ring in the nobler modes of life,
With sweeter manners, purer laws.

Ring out the want, the care, the sin,
     The faithless coldness of the times;
     Ring out, ring out my mournful rhymes,
But ring the fuller minstrel in.

Ring out false pride in place and blood,
     The civic slander and the spite;
     Ring in the love of truth and right,
Ring in the common love of good.

Ring out old shapes of foul disease;
     Ring out the narrowing lust of gold;
     Ring out the thousand wars of old,
Ring in the thousand years of peace.

Ring in the valiant man and free,
     The larger heart, the kindlier hand;
     Ring out the darkness of the land,
Ring in the Christ that is to be.

A happy New Year on January 1, March 1, and always, to all of you.


With a Little Help From Tao

Originally printed in the July - August 2000 issue of Quest magazine.
Citation: Corseri, Gary. "With a Little Help From Tao." Quest  88.4 JULY - AUGUST 2000): pg 140-145.

By Gary Corseri

If we could first know where we are, and whither we are tending, we could better judge what to do, and how to do it.

—Abraham Lincoln

Theosophical Society - Gary Corseri has published two collections of poetry: Random Descent (Anhinga) and Too Soon, As Always (Georgia Poetry Society Press). He wrote the libretto for Reverend Everyman, an opera staged by Florida State and Portland State universities and broadcast over Atlanta PBS. His articles, poems, and fiction have appeared in Quest, New York Times, Village Voice, Sky, Georgia Review, Redbook, and elsewhere. His most recent work is another novel, A Fine Excess: An Australian Odyssey (Xlibris Corporation, www.Xlibris.com, Orders@Xlibris.com), described by its cover blurb as "like Kerouac's On the Road--with a global beat" and ending with "a transcendental vision."Shortly after I turned fifty, a professor-friend asked if I would be the keynote speaker at an awards ceremony for high-school writers. The idea filled me with some trepidation. Not that I have ever minded squawking my sparse insights. Rather, I understood that something else was implicit in the request: to present myself as a writer before an assembly of minnows who had probably never seen incarnate a real, live, snorting artisan of the craft to which they so eagerly aspired and for which they were already being lauded. That was a challenge to come to terms with whatever explicit or implicit credo had guided my own scratchings towards immortality since the age of eight. Before I could hope to pass on wisdom to the young, I had to be sure of where I stood.

I remembered how my otherwise articulate father had struggled during our regular father-son talks to encapsulate the best he knew. Regardless of the love I had for him and my respect for his good intentions, I'd often been bored. Behind the uncertain verbiage, his words boiled down to a few simple ideas: "I love you. . . . I made mistakes. . . . I'm sorry. . . . I did my best. . . . Now it's your turn. . . . Be careful." Actually, it was pretty good advice.

What we learn early in life goes deep and stays long. At some point in my early teens I became fascinated with light—the way it travels and what it's made of. We were guiltless carnivores in those days, and one of my best memories is holding a flashlight on steaks and chops while my father barbecued them over glowing coals. The grill was small, so he'd rush in to bring the first batch to my younger, hungry siblings, leaving me to ponder. Alone, I began to train the flashlight on some star or planet. I could angle the beam through the smoke, watch it clearly ascend as I sent it forth with a warm greeting from a little boy to friendly aliens.

It comforts me to know that that light is traveling still. The little light we shed early on stays with us, helps define us later. The student writers I was to address had already fledged; they were training flashlights on distant stars and planets, and for all I knew, some of them would journey to those far beacons. My responsibility--a daunting one--was to steady their hands on their own lights. I could offer some rocket fuel for their voyages. The fuel I offered was Tao.

II

The metamorphosis continuously plays. --Ralph Waldo Emerson

How could the philosophy of a Chinese mystical-mythical recluse hope to lasso the erratic gyrations of a generation suckled by Pac Man and babysat by beepers?

First there's the problem of the legendary founder-nonfounder himself. Around the same time Prince Siddhartha discovers his true identity as Buddha, a court official in China decides the world, with all its buying and selling, really is too much with us. At sixty, this consummate insider throws up his hands and says good-bye to all that. As he's riding out of the city, a gatekeeper implores him to write down his reflections. The result is the Tao Te Ching, the Book of the Way, at some sixty pages perhaps the most influential book of poetry ever written. The beginning reads like an echo of our profoundest, subliminal sense of the Divine:

The Tao which can be expressed in words

Is not the eternal Tao;

The name which can be spoken

Is not the eternal Name.

It is a book of paradox, mystery, poetry, and symbolism, attempting nothing less than the total recalibration of our overwrought senses. It lights fires at nerve endings, discombobulates cortical certitudes, then laughs in our faces:

Failure is the foundation of success,

And the means by which it is achieved.

Success is the lurking place of failure.

 

The reason why rivers and seas are lords

Of a hundred mountain streams

Is that they know how to keep below them. . . .

The Sage, wishing to keep above the people,

Must by his words put himself below them.

At the turn of the millennium, consider the madding world! Perspective may help. At the end of the nineteenth century, an atmosphere of optimism pervaded the industrialized world. Even Emerson and Whitman had praised the march of progress. Following more than a century of nightmarish drudgery, the Industrial Revolution finally held forth the promise of tangible, beneficial results. Expanding markets; the diffusion of Western culture and democratic ideals; the rise of a leisure and middle class; innovations that spawned new opportunities; macadamized roads; railroads; steamships; the wireless; the popular press--all conspired to give the poor a sense of shared possibilities, while simultaneously awarding the privileged with an efflorescence in the arts unseen since the Renaissance. Never at a loss for words, the French called it La Belle Epoque.

Alas! The sorcerer's apprentice who danced so nimbly with the new technology has lost the incantation to rebottle the genie. We have seen that genie deliver us to the ovens of Dachau and the holocaust of Hiroshima. The multilinear, multispatial perspectives of Cubism, building on Freud's and Jung's conception of the psyche, has transformed into the pop, repetitive cartoon art of Lichtenstein and Warhol. The spontaneous combustion of Igor Stravinsky's "Firebird" has degenerated into the latest release by tired old rocker Mick Jagger. We have split the atom and incinerated the rain forests--all in the same century.

The pace of change consumes our energies. "A man has only to be turned around twice in this world," Thoreau wrote a century ago, "to be completely lost." For our information-overloaded children, it's barely a quarter turn. Archimedes said that if he had a lever long enough and a place to stand, he could move the world. With our modern computers, every science-savvy child may now have a lever long enough . . . but where to stand? It's difficult to plant one's feet in the soil of virtual reality.

So here comes Lao-tzu, riding his pony—Lao-tzu the spiritual whistle-blower.

Most Westerners who have heard of Tao think it has something to do with the I-Ching, that other classic of Chinese literature, which has been used for centuries to foretell the future. We know it has something to do with the yin and yang, and most know that means the male and female principle--and most are wrong.

Male and female, good and evil, hot and cold, weak and strong. . . . We carry the Manichaean heresy in our hearts. The point is not an etiolated dualism but a dynamic process ever building a unified world. The symbol of Tao is a circle divided by a serpentine line. Two embryonic forms lie in the womb of this circle--one black, one white. In the black form there is a tiny white eye; in the white form, there is a tiny black eye. It is not that we live in a simplistic, dualistic world of opposites, but that opposites abide within all things. The willow bends before the storm--and survives. The weak yields to the strong--and becomes stronger. The heart that is hardened cracks. The heart that is pliable conquers the world. No one has expressed the moral spirit of Taoism better than the beggar of Assisi:

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek

To be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love,

For it is in giving that we receive;

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.

Two and a half thousand years before our age, a Chinese court official set out to talk about process and change. There is no other philosophy quite like his. The three principal Western religions are insistently anthropocentric: the birth of the universe and the creation of Adam take place in the first six days. Buddhism, even in its quietism, perceives the wheel of karma, the cosmos of colliding galaxies, as a kind of shadow play in which we must escape from the maya of illusions--the samsara of shadows--to attain the perfection of release in samadhi, or enlightenment.

The deuce with all that, Lao-tzu might say. Just follow nature: The Way of Heaven is like the drawing of a bow; It brings down what is high And raises what is low. It is the Way of Heaven To take from those who have too much And give to those who have too little. But the way of man is not so. All things in Nature work silently. They come into being and possess nothing. They fulfill their functions and make no claim. When merit has been achieved, Do not take it to yourself; For if you do not take it to yourself, It will never be taken from you. A violent wind does not outlast the morning; A squall of rain does not outlast the day.

So, what should we tell the students?

III

What the Thunder said. --T. S. Eliot

A philosophy of paradox is one the young can sink their teeth into.

It's difficult for young people--and most of the rest of us--to think about being successful by age eighty-nine.

We want to sign the book contract now. We want the agent on the phone from Hollywood now. And the Pulitzer, and the Nobel, and the Oscar.

But what do we mean by "success"? Whether one's art is writing, painting, or dolce far niente, there are tons of how-to guides for getting one's just and unjust rewards now.

I remember a show I saw about a fifteen-year old determined to achieve fame and fortune as a rock musician. He was going to "give it everything" for a year or two, and if he hadn't made it by then, he was going to become a lawyer.

Hmm . . . .

"Our time will be recalled," Andrew Sullivan writes in ASAP, a recent supplement to Forbes, "for the way in which technology changed . . . our lives, for the way in which our choices have been expanded while our capacity to know how to choose has diminished."

One way to "know how to choose," to train the young to steady their purpose and ambition despite the whips and scorns of time, is to hone the intellect against the whetstone of Tao. Lao-tzu's doctrine is contrapuntal to our get-rich-quick, get-it-all-now ethos. His is the philosophy of the tortoise, with the ballast the young need for an even-keeled journey through the shoals and the rapids.

"If I could live to be eighty-nine," Hokusai said as a young man, "I just might learn how to be an artist." The great print artist of Japan had his wish. Also as a young man, populist poet Carl Sandburg hoped he might live as long as Hokusai--so that he, too, might relish the same grace of time to master his art. He, too, was granted that fulfillment.

Again and again Lao-tzu exhorts us to put the brakes on intelligence, especially "profound intelligence" or "sagacity." It is an exhortation for humility: "He that humbles himself shall be preserved entire." The humble Sage listens, the "profoundly intelligent" one orders and commands. The true Sage, Lao-tzu tells us, "conveys instruction without words."

The lesson for the artist is especially poignant. How often has the creative writing instructor advised his students to "let the words flow." But our self-editing ego impedes the flow. That's our "sagacity" at work, our need to know--or think we know--it all from the beginning. "The art of poetry is discovering that we know what we did not know we knew," Robert Frost wrote. Whitman was plugged into the same Taoist juice when he wrote: "Let your soul stand cool and composed before a million universes."

Tao is the corrective for the artistic self-absorption that began with the Romantic Age and has grown exponentially in our era of the superstar. "He is free from self-display, therefore he shines forth; from self-assertion, therefore he is distinguished; from self-glorification, therefore he has merit." With the Tao of creativity one transcends the self--the lower case, not the upper. One merges with the work, the true Self, the universal. Have we any such artist in the Western canon? We do--and he stands at the helm of it, though we seldom glimpse him there.

Consider the Bard of Avon, the peerless self-effacer. Consider his theme of overvaunting ambition in Macbeth, King Lear, and Julius Caesar. He tells us to "hold the mirror up to nature" in Hamlet; spurns "taffeta phrases, silken terms precise" in Love's Labor's Lost; finds us all "merely players" in As You Like It; laments in Measure for Measure that "proud man, / Drest in a little brief authority . . . Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven / As make the angels weep." He has the gift of gab, perfect pitch for the sound of words, exactly calibrated scales for the lightness and weight of the heart. His empathy is godlike: "the poor beetle, that we tread upon, / In corporal sufferance finds a pang as great / As when a giant dies."

Nature never made a more equable man, but what do we know of him? He was involved in a minor lawsuit; he left his second favorite bed to his somewhat older wife; he had a son named Hamnet. The figure of the man is as ghostly as the one character we surmise he played. Many cannot even imagine that he wrote his plays. But what if he had put as much energy into public relations as our modern celebrity artists? Wouldn't we have tired of him by now?

Lao-tzu's is not a message to extinguish the ego, but to nurture it truly. I had to return to my childhood to understand.

There was a synagogue in my neighborhood, and as a child and boy on my way to school, I'd pass it unthinkingly. Only when in my young manhood I made a nostalgic visit home, did I notice the words above the lintel. They are the prophet Micah's words, perhaps the most elegant and concise answer ever given to one's own rhetorical question: "What is required of a man but to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with God." The ultimate humility is humility before the act of Creation and the creative act.

Lao-tzu's lesson is appropriateness--a rare word today, a word like shame and honor. Some have misunderstood the lesson. The natural path, the appropriate path, is often the most practical: "In the management of affairs, people constantly break down just when they are nearing a successful issue. If they took as much care at the end as at the beginning, they would not fail in their enterprises."

It is no surprise, perhaps, that the sixty-fourth hexagram of the I-Ching, the very last, echoes Lao-tzu's sound advice. The I-Ching ends with a looped thought, entitled "Almost There." Just as the little fox thinks he has safely crossed the stream, he gets his tail wet. In human terms, just as we believe we've reached the fruition of our hopes, we are most likely to lower our guard, to suffer some reversal. We have only to consider today's headlines to see which potentate failed to heed Lao-tzu's counsel. We have only to look in the mirror.

But some always choose to misunderstand: "He who is enlightened by Tao seems wrapped in darkness," Lao-tzu tells us. "He who is advanced in Tao seems to be going back. He who walks smoothly in Tao seems to be on a rugged path."

What better gift for the young than this bracing tonic of paradoxes? One cannot preach to them; they abhor the preacher. So what to say, what to offer?

When pointing to the moon, the haiku poet says, take off your ring. No embellishments will do for the young seekers. Like Thoreau, they must have life raw, on their own terms, they must "live deliberately."

"Chaos is the name of an order we have not yet understood," Henry Miller wrote. The child is comfortable with chaos. The child plays King of the Mountain on the ruins of lost civilizations. Our challenge is to integrate the spirit of the child with the wisdom of the adult. As we get older, let our minds grow sharper even as our hearts grow simpler.

Yong Joon Yoon, a Korean friend and writer, told me a story: It seems there was a beast named Chaos. This animal did lots of good things for the people. But it did not have eyes, ears, mouth, or a nose. So the people drilled holes into its hide to make ears; they slit the skin to make eyes, a mouth, and a nose. And after a few days, the animal died.

Before the mind grows rigid with doctrines it is fluid with possibilities, instructed by riddles, opened with conundrums. The creative spirit plays riffs on those conundrums, growing wiser and deeper. We all have the capacity to discover the true patterns of the world, whether we see them in fractal geometry, or in the faces of kindred beings.

"I have three precious things," Lao-tzu wrote. "The first is gentleness; the second is frugality; the third is humility. . . . Be gentle so that you may be bold. . . . Practice frugality so that you may be generous. Cultivate humility so that you may be a true leader."

This, then, is the essence of Tao: the continuous flux; the certainty of things transforming into other things, even their opposites; life's constant surprise and how to accommodate ourselves to it so that we can ride the highest wave with aplomb even when it delivers us to the chasm. The wave will rise again, the yin in the heart of yang will sound the dominant key, the yang in the heart of yin will startle us again.

On April 9th, 1998, as a tornado totaled our house above us, my wife and I embraced in our basement for what we thought would be our last time. We had tracked the storm cell on the TV screen's Doppler. Incredulous, we'd watched for half an hour as it arced its slow, inexorable path towards us. Five minutes before it hit, the wind picked up, and it kept growing in intensity until the last two minutes, when a strange silence fell out of the hovering air. Then light was flashbulbing everywhere in the sky, and I heard the signature freight train noise, but it was like a shuffling, predatory roar as the thing shifted its weight, wiping out one house, then leaping over another. We had just made it down to the basement when it hit, and in the midst of it, at the pinnacle of the confusion, roar, and acrid fear, there was the most delicate, tinkling sound of wind chimes or champagne glasses clinking in toasts. Only later did we learn it was all the windows in the house shattering at once.

I have never heard a more beautiful sound.


Gary Corseri has published two collections of poetry: Random Descent (Anhinga) and Too Soon, As Always(Georgia Poetry Society Press). He wrote the libretto for Reverend Everyman, an opera staged by Florida State and Portland State universities and broadcast over Atlanta PBS. His articles, poems, and fiction have appeared in Quest, New York Times, Village Voice, Sky, Georgia Review, Redbook, and elsewhere


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